....ginamarina's world....
 


1-11-2004

it was still nice of them to invite me
even after everyone else was there

the noise, the laughter, the children
it all makes my heart smile

then the time came to say goodbye
little girl kisses and grown up hugs

one by one, tracks in the snow
as i made my way to my truck

laughing with the little one
saying bye to grandma and grandpa

hugs once again, then it began to hit
as i continued to walk -not looking back

dad had to say goodbye again
and my voice crackled through the dark

i know he heard it, he had to have
i tried to escape without notice

i tried.

the tears fell as i held the wheel
pushing through the newly fallen snow

what is normally 15 minutes took 30
by then the tears had dried

face beginning to tighten
feeling the salt imbibe my eyelids

it's quiet now. completely silent
only the keys as i type

i have no feeling now but numbness
for i don't know what to feel

the fear, from the past is lurking
the black hole is there but i won't look

i will awaken tomorrow
it will seem like they're still here

they'll be having fun, i know
and for that i am happy

i will feel an empty space here
in my quiet cavern of blankets and purries

and the next day will come
and the next

and i will be here.

2004 Ginamarina

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